Repentance as a Lifestyle

Repentance as a Direction, Not an Emergency

Repenting of our sins should feel as vital and normal to disciples of Christ as breathing, eating, and possessing a beating heart. We do not wait for a great fall to turn back to God; we turn daily, in the small course-corrections of an honest life. Paul described the whole of discipleship in four plain words—"do works meet for repentance" (Acts 26:20)—and the word disciple itself shares its root with discipline: a disciple of Christ is a devoted student who practices, and keeps practicing, what the Master teaches (John 8:31).

Repentance kept daily is not a burden of endless guilt; it is the ordinary rhythm by which God changes us from the inside out. Jesus provided the divine pattern: "If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me" (Luke 9:23). The daily lifestyle of honest personal accounting and humble repentance before God nourishes one's spirit to a lively state of being.

This is why King Benjamin's people did not repent once and move on. They were told to call "on the name of the Lord daily" so they might "always retain a remission" of their sins (Mosiah 4:11–12). "Yea, and as often as my people repent will I forgive them their trespasses" (Mosiah 26:30).

In connection with this principle of repentance, we remember the Lord's paired statements to the woman taken in adultery—the pardon, "Neither do I condemn thee," and the charge, "Go, and sin no more" (John 8:11). We cannot be perfected in a day. We cannot climb to God by our own strength. We simply keep turning to Him in repentance, taking up our cross daily, and let Him change us from within, throughout our lives, until that "perfect day" (Proverbs 4:18).

The Sorrow That Leads Somewhere

The word repent comes to us through Middle English from Latin roots, and its meaning is to feel deep sorrow. There can be no true repentance where there is no true sorrow—but not every sorrow heals. Paul drew the line precisely: "godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation… but the sorrow of the world worketh death" (2 Corinthians 7:10). Worldly sorrow is the shame and resentment at being caught and found guilty of sin; it can only condemn—it circles the same regret and calls it penance. Godly sorrow moves—it motivates one to reach toward God, toward change, toward mercy.

Godly sorrow carries five marks: honesty enough to admit our errors; depth of character enough to feel the weight of sin; humility enough to accept our need to be forgiven; a real desire to change and to keep trying; and faith that God is merciful and gracious enough to forgive us. Notice where it ends—not in self-loathing, but in faith. King Benjamin's people, struck by exactly this sorrow, cried out for mercy and were filled with joy and the peace of conscience (Mosiah 4:2–3). Sorrow was the doorway; it was never meant to be the room we live in.

The Anatomy of a Real Turning

Sorrow begins repentance; it does not complete it. The Lord's own measure of a true turning is plain: "By this ye may know if a man repenteth of his sins—behold, he will confess them and forsake them" (D&C 58:43). Both verbs matter. To confess is to stop hiding and name the wrong before God—and, when we have injured someone, before them. To forsake is to commit to a path of change so that, in time, we no longer return to the sin.

Elder Robert D. Hales taught that the depth of our repentance should match the severity of our sin. After recognizing and mourning what we have done, we pray to ask God's forgiveness; we commit to change; and where we have harmed another, we apologize and, if possible, make restitution. For sins of a more serious nature—or when we simply cannot seem to break free—God has provided inspired help: we may confess to a trusted religious leader and ask for guidance (James 5:16). Confession to a leader is not humiliation; it is a lifeline the Lord Himself extends. The Lord has promised that of the sins we confess and forsake, He "will remember them no more" (D&C 58:42).

Becoming, Bit by Bit

Repentance kept daily does something slow and beautiful over a life. As it becomes part of our daily personal religion, we gradually commit fewer and less severe sins; the depth of remorse we must feel grows lighter; and the stretches of happiness and freedom from guilt grow longer and more frequent. This is sanctification—to become pure and holy—and it comes not in a single leap but line upon line, across the whole length of our days. It is possible only through a meek and humble willingness to acknowledge our own wrongdoing, and it is "aided by the power of the Spirit of God."

Here is the truth that keeps this from becoming a burden: grace is not the reward at the end of repentance; it is the power that makes repentance possible. We "work out" our salvation "with fear and trembling" precisely because "it is God which worketh in [us]" (Philippians 2:12–13). The spiritual fruits of repentance can be so profound that we begin to have "no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually" (Mosiah 5:2). And of the sins we have truly forsaken, the Lord promises they "shall not be mentioned unto him" (Ezekiel 33:16)—remembered no more, so that we are free to keep becoming what God intended.